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February 27th, 2012

adalger: Ron Paul: GET OFF MY LAWN! (paul)
Monday, February 27th, 2012 03:47 pm
In an effort to boost his polling numbers among older conservatives, Ron Paul has released a clarification statement regarding his Presidential platform: "Look, people," he said at a rally held at an AARP brunch Monday, "the whole campaign position comes down to one simple sentence. GET OFF MY LAWN, YOU DAMNED KIDS!"

Doug "Smoke" Wead later clarified, speaking to a group of reporters. "It's a little more complicated than that, but actually, not much. The Libertarian position is founded on certain basic principals. One, if a wrong doesn't inconvenience me personally and I didn't actually commit it, I shouldn't have to care about it. Two, if a wrong does inconvenience me, everyone in the world is responsible for righting it. Three, if a wrong was committed by me, then I should only have to do anything about it if the people inconvenienced by it can afford better lawyers than I can. Oh, and four, GET OFF MY DAMNED LAWN ALREADY!"
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